How do you say "Enough Already" in Kazakh?

I'll admit to being as big an Ali G fan as the next person, and to dragging Mr. TMCL to see the Borat movie (and yes, the wedding is miraculously still on after making my poor fiance sit through the "Eat my Asshole"! hairy naked guy scene), but holy freakin SHIT, I'm tired of hearing about Borat!

To the uppity Kazakhs getting offended that Sacha Baron Cohen is portraying your country in a "bad light": It's a freakin joke! Deal. Americans are routinely stereotyped as fat, dumb, violent, materialistic, bigoted, inbred, loud, uncouth, promiscuous, gluttonous slobs every day in the media and you don't hear us complaining. Has anyone declared war on you because of this film? Have Kazakhstan's booming tourism and high tech industries suffered economic losses because of Borat? Do you realize that 90% of the world's population would not have the slightest freaking idea where the hell Kazakhstan even is if not for our buddy Borat and his antics?

We could even go out on a limb and say you're not fully recognized as a people and as a country until there are some obnoxious stereotypes of you out there. Borat has given you that. And in fact, it sounds like Borat's Kazakh tales were pretty spot-on less than half a decade ago. Suing Sacha kinda makes you come across as golddiggers.

To the whiny entitled Americans complaining that their jackassery has been caught on film: Tough. Next time, try not getting wasted when you know your subsequent behavior is going to be filmed. Is this really that difficult? You're obviously a sexist racist drunk idiot and/or a self-important snot. Now the world knows what all your friends, coworkers, and family know. It probably wasn't news to them either. What kind of idiot doesn't suspect they're going to be in a movie when some known comedian with a video production crew in tow makes you sign a release form before they film you?

Finally, what the freak is up with all this Borat buzz in the news? Didn't we just have an election or a war in Iraq or something like that?

How Feminism F*cked Women Over

"Destroy the family and you destroy society." - Lenin

Biodork has brought it to my attention that perhaps I need to set the record straight on something. I am not a misogynist cavewoman. I just hate modern-day feminism.

When the woman's rights movement was initially founded, this country needed it. Women were second-class citizens, couldn't own property, couldn't vote, if they didn't find a husband by age 18 or so they were screwed, if anything ever happend to him they were screwed until they found another one (commodifying men in fact. If they weren't pretty and able to give birth, they were worthless.

This was wrong and needed changed. Enter Susan B. Anthony, Elizabeth Cady Stanton, and their compadres. How nice of these ladies to make sure the rest of us women weren't living in a van down by the river if we ever found ourselves husbandless for any period of time. They were the true pro-woman feminists. They wanted women to have the opportunities and abilities both to get educations/jobs *and* to have children, and to make this country a friendly environment to those possibilities. They were pro-child. Pro-man. The interests of the three groups *can* coexist.

That was when my great-grandma was my age though, so these ladies are long dead and for all intents and purposes, forgotten.

Enter the Second Wave of feminists. The Gloria Steinems who love abortion and hate men. The Betty Freidens who hate marriage, hate motherhood, and launch campaigns to make all women who want either or both be reviled as worthless patriarchical throwbacks. They're not about women's choices, they're about railroading women down a path to this mold that they (a select but powerful few) think all women are obligated to want.

Stereotypes are spread about men that they are stupid, unfaithful, insensitive, pigs. Some are, but evilness is not confined to the male sex. Anti-male affirmative action gives women preference in hiring and school admissions, leaving the residual question "did she get hired because she was the smartest and best candidate, or because she has a vagina and having a woman on staff proves something?" As a lady who has a "man's job", I agree that the XX-chromosone and the left-brain dominance are not the common combination. It *isn't* the typical woman who gets 750 on the Math section of the SAT's, likes the "logical" disciplines better than the "humanities", and doesn't pursue a job where she can feel "fulfilled" or "make a difference". But the second I have an "off" day and make a mistake, there goes the question in my coworkers' heads. And it gets a little old to see one of the other token females pull me aside and tell me how "you have to choose between family and career" (says what law? You think abortion is so great? Then how come every woman I know who's had one has lingering deep-seated psychological problems as a direct result?) and "if you get fat, you're not going to be successful" (If one serving of french fries is going to take me from on the thin side to obese, that would indicate a very serious metabolic problem.) And if one more bitter, dried up old baby boomer lady tells me how she had it sooo bad at work when she was my age as justification for acting like a complete bitch towards me, I am going to vomit. None of this shit inspires me to be selflessly devoted to my career.

And by the way, my impending nuptials and family plans do not make my intelligence or education a waste. Was I obligated to be homeless before I snagged a husband? Apparently so... before I met Mr. TMCL, seemed like almost every guy I met "the normal way" (not online, where you make said preferences clear upfront) just assumed that because damn me, I have a job, meant I categorically hate children. Nor should I have ever been put down by the feminazi fringe or kicked out of the sisterhood for wanting these things. You want to advance women? That's what this woman wants, and is what is best for me. If I'm smart enough to have a career, I'm smart enough to figure that out. Deal.

Thanks to their influence, there is limited knowledge of public health as well. Why should my gynecologist feel nervous to tell me that fertility declines sharply at 35ish? Even if you don't have an MD, is this really a suprise? Do the majority of women you know give birth in their 40s and 50s (without donor eggs, multiple miscarriages, and birth defects)? How about tell us the truth, even if it's not what you think we want to hear? Or should all doctors just not give us bad news? If you had lung cancer, would you want your doctor to say, "everything's cool, keep smoking 3 packs a day" or "get some chemo and nicorette unless you want to die a slow painful death"? It's my vagina, not an arena for sociopolitical action. Women deserve to know the truth.

If feminists really do speak for the wants of all women, then why all the backlash? If all women need men like fishes needs a bicycles, want careers not babies, etc, then why is it certain married women (with or without kids) that I know froze me out between the year-plus period between "turned 26 without a ring" and "got engaged"? Why did my soon-to-be-ex-doctor's ignorant-ass nurse recently tell me I'm mortally sinning to be taking birth control? Why does it feel like I'll be getting married, gaining social acceptance, and committing a major act of civil and social disobedience all in two little words: "I do."?

Women who want marriage and children can follow their hearts (which will whoop-a-dee-doo, get them conditionally "in good" with these bitches) and then run into a bunch of brick walls put there by the feminists. They can pay a big fat marriage penalty tax. They may be (justifiably) scared to tell their bosses that they're pregnant. Their health insurance might not cover childbirth and/or pregnancy, and they might lose their job if they take maternity leave. They might be forced to work when they'd rather be at home with their children, thanks to tax rates being jacked up by "feminist" programs designed to force women out of the house. Daycare might eat up most of their salary, and their employers might not be willing to let them leave on time to pick up their kids there. How is this advancing women?

And how could I be for any of this in good conscience unless I hated men or hated myself?

So until the woman's movement is legitimitely interested in making this world a better place for all women, without making it a worse place for the unborn or for me, count me out.